Un pedazo de tristeza

Es como la tercera vez que empiezo esta cosa. Me siento triste... como si me hubiera decepcionado, creyendo cosas que los demás me decían hasta que no las pude distinguir de la verdad de lo que sentía realmente. Pero bueno, ¿qué es la verdad cuando nos toca hablar de cosas del corazón, de los sentimientos? Ya casi me he rendido con respecto a ese asunto. De veras - casi creo que no hay verdad ni ilusión en eso que llamamos sentimiento. Es verdad porque lo sentimos, y a la vez, no contiene ni la menor parte de esa verdad objetiva fuera de lo que lo que proviene de la mente de uno mismo. Bueno, dices que sueno algo decepcionada, tal vez desilusionada con los sentimientos, hasta con la humanidad. A cierto punto, tendrías razón. Pero más que nada, creo que he perdido la confianza en mí mismo, porque me creí una persona amable, por lo menos esperando lo mejor para los demás, y he aquí un amigo con el que he vaciado el significado de la amistad, siento... O bueno, tal vez nada más hice lo que tuve que hacer, pero sea lo que sea, me siento toda la ingrata hoy.

You sickly thing

So this seems like the perfect day to write a blog entry (I admit that I've left it behind for quite some time now - well, only a few days, really) since I've got the whoooole day to myself. And my whoooole bedroom to myself. In fact, people probably wouldn't even appreciate it if I stepped outside the bounds of my bedroom for very long. What is this, you may ask? I seem to have come down with strep throat (most likely). Fortunately, somewhere amidst the feeling cold despite being under three blankets, having a headache, and having a song stuck in my head (well, that wasn't really that bad - haha), I've started to feel better, probably thanks to the aspirin I took a while back. It is interesting: I know that my roommate Margaret has heard (from a qualified source) that in general, unless the fever is really bad, it's generally better to not treat it so that your body can just do what it's trying to do, fever and all. It sounds good in theory (and it makes me wonder just a bit if I really should have taken that aspirin), but it sounds rather miserable in practice, too. So, who knows.

I think I'll get the most out of this computer and the internet today, if I'm going to be in bed all day. Part of me really wishes they had two things you could watch online: episodes of Star Trek TNG and episodes of House (I think I've already seen all the episodes from one of the sites I use). Ah, well - we'll see how things go. Sorry this blog has turned into an anticipation of what I'll do the rest of the day than a reflection on what's already happened. Or, well, I guess it can be whatever I want it to be, right?

Mary out, now.

Pensamientos no tan profundos

So I'm a bit tired and headachey right now. Perhaps that's not the most eloquent way to start off a blog entry. Ah, well.

Tonight we had a roommate dinner. Margaret made some delicious rice and chicken with a homemade peanut sauce. Afterwards, we contemplated the implications of seed people that sprout from seeds and are NOT crossed with vegetables but that only last as long as vegetables do - this was some sort of art project being done by someone Emma knows.

I'm coming up with a schedule for when classes start for me next Wednesday. I find it interesting that I am so all about spontaneity, yet I really like making schedules (not necessarily following them!) and the idea of regularity (at least sometimes). They make me happy.

See? Now I'm not feeling so bad. Talking to my sister has helped too.

Now I'm going to go. I owe Margaret a neck massage, and I would love to get some sleep. For once. ;)


Mary, signing out